I present the reader with a biography of a mystic. In the usual concept of a Cristian it sould be a picture of a human who is interested in finding the best relation to God and then he would modify his life accordingly. His life may be either dramatic or successful but always asketic.
If a laic mystic is involved, however, he (the reader) expects, that he will learn about mirracles and personal successes of a person, who easily manages to escape all diffculties which wordly people may encounter.
In this biography, however, a mystic of Tibeat School is described. Therefore his mysticism inheres in his life, which is divided in an inner life and outer (worldly) life and both these lives differ significantly from each other in the first stage, but in any case they are very bold.
Since this boldness appears to be first of all subjective, it may, in an uninformed reader, induce a suspition that the inner life of a Tibetan mystic is a made-up fiction or that a lot of phantasy is added to it. In reality, though, the Tibetan mysticism symbolizes(represents) a highly intense inner life which then ripens to a level where the imperfect outer life is absorbed by the inner one.
Laic mystics think that the intensity of inner life brings sensually pleasing results immediatelly also on the level of the outer life. That is a mistake, which evidences the lack of knowledge of the mystical path. From the view point of the mystical progress the most important thing is if the aspirer of the spiritual perfection accomplishes to be able to live the mystical life as real and concrete and not as an emotional drifting which spirits someone away in weak abstract states and excitations, as it often happens. Such an emotional drifting has nothing to do with mysticism; it comes out of passive life style of a weakling who only longs for distant things and dreams of them, while mysticism means a discipline with which one grabs himself on the psychological level and then directs himself to mental states he wants to live.
Concerning the discrepancies which the reader may observe in talks about spiritual power on one side and about infavorable fate on the other side, he (the reader) may resolve these by understanding that the worldly fate symbolizes the ripe karma, whereas the inner fate symbolizes the recently induced and therefore not ripe karma. He may explain everything by comparing it to life of a person in winter. Winter time represents our life; in winter we also live from the precedent crop and not from fall seeding. According to that I also, at the physical level, live from the crop of my previous acts, but I found a teaching and with its help I could prepare the ground of a new karma and sow the seed for a new good crop. And if there is no possibility to harvest the fruits of the seeding, which was the mystical effort, in this world, I can harvest it on a different level. It is needed to know that by our mental life we may belong to other spheres already when we live our physical life on Earth. And this is the comfort of those who work a lot and do not immediatelly harvest the fruits of their effort and work.
I have learned to know the mystical life very well. Therefore I do not have to look for the border-line between "now", which expresses the physical life and existence and "then" which expresses the time after the death. Due to that I live the future in the presence and thus also the mystical life as a concreate real life. Otherwise the mystical life could not appear as real, not even to me, but only as a dreamy life; then there would not be any need to write this biography and all the precedent books on the teaching.
We may dream whatever we want, yet it is useless. The same holds for the so called mystical states. Every mystical passion is a temporar state, whose importance is damaged by the reality of life, the ordinary physical life. These inner states can be compared to the excitement, which we bring back from a theatre or movie theatre, with the excitement which disappears as soon as the ordinary life begins to influence us with its strong pressures.
I can say about me, that my inner life did not melt in the hotest furnace of the fate. It was like a crystal, which kept its structure under all circumstances and this by itself shows that it was real. On the contrary, it was proven that it was more real than ordinary life because it was strengthening itself when I had problems, up to such a level that all fatal incidents appeared only as waves hitting a firm rocky cliffs of the mystically strengthen inside.
This is maybe a little extraordinarity which I fould in my mystical life, when I observed many so called mystics. They usually left mysticism immediately after something hard and important had happened to them in the outer life, while in me, the mystical life only became bolder. But not even by that I judge my superiority over these mystics. I know that they would also sustain the fatal pressures, so much touching the mystical effort, if they had no place where to turn to, the same way I had no place to go. It was clear to me that a person can be desperate or destroying him/herself by hopes and yet it would not help him/her in the fight with reality. This is why I was fetching as much breath as I needed to overcome the burdens of life, the burdens I was encountering at the time when I was still in some sense mystically growing.
I was probably karmically ripe immediately when I was born. Therefore I did not believe in half-way solutions, which I saw in someone's efforts to get a slice of bread right now and for any price (even for the price of the inner life). I thought that both the difficulties and favors of the fortune are ripe fruits of the karma, which may only be eaten when they fall to one's hands. And since I always obeyed this opinion I did not create any new so called casual karma. Therefore there is a field clear karma behind me and only this foreshadows that the pain will stop together with this perturbed body, which I bear. With respect to that I feel authorized to pronounce this wish:
May many people learn the law of Karma and with its help may they achive freedom!
May many people live the mystical life in such a way that it would not be just an emotional passion but a real life!
May many people destroy time, which separates their physical "now" and after-death "then"!
May many people learn to know the gods and may they learn from them about the life style which finishes the suffering!
May many people achive the highest LIBERATION!